Monday, July 19, 2010

Ever have one of those moments?

You know the type.

The kind that makes you doubt everything and makes you feel all alone.

So I had one of those "connections" today. Something that, if I lived in New York or LA or Chicago, would be up on Craigslist in the Missed Connections section.
"You dropped your change at the supermarket, and I picked it up for you, and then all the air in the world disappeared for just a moment. You left and turned right in your blue minivan while I turned left in my black Saab. Let's relive that shocking breathlessness."

If only.

But it got me to thinking. As everyone well knows, I suck at emotions and relationships. I haven't even had anything you could truly call a relationship.
Right now, however, I am in a mutual state of missing with someone.

I miss him dearly.
Sometimes, at the most random times, while I'm eating a lobster roll or just sitting there or watching an adorable couple on vacation (it happens a lot here), I miss him.
Or while we're chatting, and I'm wishing I could hear him saying these things, not just read them...
Or when my day has been terrible and I'm cranky and I can't deal with anyone and I feel like I'm going to pull my hair out, and he sends me just a few words and my whole day is better...

Or sometimes, when it's late at night and the thought of going to bed alone seems like an insurmountable task...

And my heart aches a little bit.

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